I think those of us that live in America have learned to have certain…expectations. Let’s leave it at that, for the moment…as humans, one of a trillion species that live on this planet, we think we are afforded some sort of ‘break’ from certain things. That we are deserving of all the good things the world has to offer…not the really icky things…not the things that seem unfair. Like, parents should never have to bury their children, we should only die when we’re very old…no suffering, because dammit all, we shouldn’t have to suffer. It isn’t fair when the natural order of things goes…well…out of order.
Why is it that when someone has an untimely death, we feel the need to explain it as part of a greater plan? Like they had to leave quickly because they were needed in some other dimension. I’m not talking about theology or any belief system, so know that up front, I’m talking about the absolute ridiculousness of trying to make ourselves feel better. Our expectation is that no one we love will die.
Why aren’t we more prepared? Why do people tell us not to worry, that nothing will happen…as I sit in the waiting room at a hospital, waiting to hear the news that my husband came out of surgery like a trooper…I can’t help but think these thoughts. Yes, it’s a routine knee replacement and he has one of the best doctors there is, it’s a state of the art knee…he passed all the rigorous tests before his surgery. So…good to go! All of our expectations are steeped in, it’s going to be ok because it wouldn’t be fair if it wasn’t. The chances are ever so slim that anything bad will happen. That is my expectation. It wouldn’t be too much to ask for would it?…or would it?
Back to the Americans, of which I am one, and having certain expectations…I’m rather amazed that we believe we are the chosen. Not all of us have a sense of humor about this. About themselves. When I see people in another part of the world fleeing execution by their own government, fleeing on a rubber raft, knowing that the chances of drowning are extremely high…they try to escape anyway. They look like us, maybe even a similar socio-economic standing in their country. I think, these people have no expectations that they will live or die. None. They know that they were definitely going to die if they stayed and they may very well lose a child to the cold dark water. Like wild animals, wild nature. Knowing they can and will be eaten if they don’t make a move. Americans on the other hand, are fat house cats. We know we are going to be fed and protected. No harm can possibly come to us. “They” wouldn’t let anything happen. We are the good guys, we are savvy, more advanced and greater than any country on this planet.
I can see with my own distorted lens…this candy coated bubble cracking, splitting into a million hairline fissures…all the icky things are oozing out. Can you see them? Our greatness as a country slightly tarnished…or is it? Is it just that we are like those people on the rafts? Were they lulled into a false sense of security? Can we, as US citizens, be bombed and driven out of our homes at gun point? Yes, even though at this time my expectation is that it can’t and it won’t…we really can’t ever expect or assume there is some grand plan that protects us. Sometimes if I accidently step on a line of ants, I think…are their friends asking themselves if there might be a greater plan for those that have experienced an untimely demise?
As for my husband? Yes, everything turned out great with his surgery…now it’s all about the rehab. And I do have great expectations for this man and his knee!